I am horrible with expressing my feelings. When it comes to telling people what I am thinking, half of the time I fail. There are many things that I know inside my brain. I know them to be true and I believe in them but when it comes to explaining why or how...I get all flustered and my brain shuts down.
I have been asked a question many times. I've tried to answer it and I feel like I did a decent job, but this morning I found an example for the asnwer that made total sense to me. I'm still getting asked by my children so I'm excited that I have a great way to answer it now.
The question is, "Why don't your forgive me and forget what I did? Why do I have to be punished?"
I have always answered, "you have made this choice. This was your action. I forgive you but that doesn't mean that you are free from the consequence. My forgiveness has nothing to do with the consequences of your actions."
While I was reading in Moses 6, it explained that Adam and Eve were forgiven while they were in the Garden of Eden. Adam asked the Lord in verse 53, "Why is it that men must repent and be baptized in water? And the Lord said unto Adam: Behold I have forgiven thee thy transgression in the Garden of Eden."
The Lord forgave them, but they still had to leave the garden. Why? Because it was the consequence of their action. The Lord told them that from the beginning. The Lord still loved them, blessed them, directed them, and provided a Savior for them. The Lord was teaching them also starting in verse 55, "sin conceiveth in their hearts, and they tasted the bitter, that they may know to prize the good.
And it is given unto them to know good from evil; wherefore they are agents unto themselves..."
I am grateful Heavenly Father has given us our freedom to choose for ourselves. We have the free agency to either follow the Lord of not. It is up to us, but we are not free from the consequences of our actions.
The following is an example of when my son would ask me, why can't you just forgive me? Why do you punish me?
One thing I have no tolerance for is lying. I have wanted to make sure my kids knew how important it was to be honest in all they do. When my son started lying to me, I made sure he was punished. I wanted to teach him that a habit of lying will mean that nobody will be able to trust him. I wanted him to know that I was teaching him to be a man of integrity, and to be someone that others could look up to.
These punishments didn't always work. The mostly consisted of taking away video game time, writing sentences, or weeding. One day, he lied to me again and I was tired. I couldn't stand it anymore. When he knew he was caught, he asked me to forgive him and told me he would never do it again.
I explained my reasons why I feel it is so serious. I told him that I knew he was a great boy, that I am lucky to have him as my son, but Heavenly Father has given me the responsibly to teach him what is right and wrong. I also explained that I want to be able to trust him whenever he tells me something. He had lied so many times, that I didn't trust him when he told me things. I hated that. I wanted to know that my son was not trying to deceive me. So I asked him what I could do to teach him.
Together we came up with a plan that he would not have a punishment this time. He was going to promise never to lie to me again, no matter what, even if it meant that he would get in trouble. If I caught him lying to me, his consequence was going to be huge. No computer for 3 months. His love and reason for living at the time was to play Minecraft on the computer. This was a huge punishment. He was hesitant but he agreed.
I was impressed that he lasted as long as he did, but habits are hard to break. Three long months of no computer.
Ever since then, he hasn't been perfect. He's a kid and all kids like to get away with things, but when it comes to telling me the truth when I ask him a question, he has earned my trust back. I am proud of him.
I have been asked a question many times. I've tried to answer it and I feel like I did a decent job, but this morning I found an example for the asnwer that made total sense to me. I'm still getting asked by my children so I'm excited that I have a great way to answer it now.
The question is, "Why don't your forgive me and forget what I did? Why do I have to be punished?"
I have always answered, "you have made this choice. This was your action. I forgive you but that doesn't mean that you are free from the consequence. My forgiveness has nothing to do with the consequences of your actions."
While I was reading in Moses 6, it explained that Adam and Eve were forgiven while they were in the Garden of Eden. Adam asked the Lord in verse 53, "Why is it that men must repent and be baptized in water? And the Lord said unto Adam: Behold I have forgiven thee thy transgression in the Garden of Eden."
The Lord forgave them, but they still had to leave the garden. Why? Because it was the consequence of their action. The Lord told them that from the beginning. The Lord still loved them, blessed them, directed them, and provided a Savior for them. The Lord was teaching them also starting in verse 55, "sin conceiveth in their hearts, and they tasted the bitter, that they may know to prize the good.
And it is given unto them to know good from evil; wherefore they are agents unto themselves..."
I am grateful Heavenly Father has given us our freedom to choose for ourselves. We have the free agency to either follow the Lord of not. It is up to us, but we are not free from the consequences of our actions.
The following is an example of when my son would ask me, why can't you just forgive me? Why do you punish me?
One thing I have no tolerance for is lying. I have wanted to make sure my kids knew how important it was to be honest in all they do. When my son started lying to me, I made sure he was punished. I wanted to teach him that a habit of lying will mean that nobody will be able to trust him. I wanted him to know that I was teaching him to be a man of integrity, and to be someone that others could look up to.
These punishments didn't always work. The mostly consisted of taking away video game time, writing sentences, or weeding. One day, he lied to me again and I was tired. I couldn't stand it anymore. When he knew he was caught, he asked me to forgive him and told me he would never do it again.
I explained my reasons why I feel it is so serious. I told him that I knew he was a great boy, that I am lucky to have him as my son, but Heavenly Father has given me the responsibly to teach him what is right and wrong. I also explained that I want to be able to trust him whenever he tells me something. He had lied so many times, that I didn't trust him when he told me things. I hated that. I wanted to know that my son was not trying to deceive me. So I asked him what I could do to teach him.
Together we came up with a plan that he would not have a punishment this time. He was going to promise never to lie to me again, no matter what, even if it meant that he would get in trouble. If I caught him lying to me, his consequence was going to be huge. No computer for 3 months. His love and reason for living at the time was to play Minecraft on the computer. This was a huge punishment. He was hesitant but he agreed.
I was impressed that he lasted as long as he did, but habits are hard to break. Three long months of no computer.
Ever since then, he hasn't been perfect. He's a kid and all kids like to get away with things, but when it comes to telling me the truth when I ask him a question, he has earned my trust back. I am proud of him.
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